the thought of motherhood is scary
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Confessions of An Ordinary Girl | The Thought of Motherhood Is Scary

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It's super hard to confess, but the thought of motherhood is scary. I'm sharing thoughts as I'm processing this new, unknown journey.

It’s super hard to confess, but the thought of motherhood is scary. There, I said it, and I feel a lot better!

Since I’ve been on this surprise pregnancy journey, the thought of mothering a tiny baby that can’t tell me what’s wrong is ever so daunting. In the back of mind I thought that maybe someday we’d adopt or be foster parents, but that would likely have been to a child that was toddler age or older (you know, one that can talk).

The “what ifs” constantly cloud my mind:

What if the crying drives me insane?

What if there’s never any time with Trent, or even for myself?

What if I don’t have the patience to be a mom?

What if my child turns out to be a brat that no one wants to be around?

The list goes on and on.

I’m sure these are feelings and “what ifs” that all first-time moms have rolling around in their brains. If they’re not, I’ll definitely be the first to admit that I can be selfish.

One thing I learned when I went to counseling a few years ago was that it’s okay to feel the way I do. I also learned that it’s valuable to dig a bit deeper and ask myself why I’m feeling the way I feel. And if I’m being totally honest, all of the “what ifs” stem from me being scared.

Motherhood is a lifelong journey and I’m learning that it’s normal and okay to be scared to walk down a new, unknown path of life.

Even as I was pondering what to share in this post, the Lord showed me this in my morning devotions.

“Instead of gazing into the unknown future, live each moment in joyful awareness of My Presence. I hold your future safely in My hands. It will unfurl before you as you go step by step through each day.” – Sarah Young, Dear Jesus

No matter what we face as mothers, the Lord has not only determined our path but He walks alongside us on our journey!

Is/was the thought of motherhood scary for you? (Please share your thoughts in the comments below.)

4 Comments

  1. Dawnita
    Dawnita07-18-2014

    LOL. I just have to laugh, not at you, but at how silly we can be. I remember thinking things like, “What if I sleep too hard & don’t wake up when I’m needed?” & “What if there’s a spider close to my baby and I’m too scared to kill it?” After we brought her home, I found myself waking up anytime that cradle wiggled the tiniest bit or she even sighed heavily. The first little spider I saw on the wall near the cradle got a quick squish with my thumb before I even had a chance to think about it. I was amazed! The last thing you need to do when you are expecting is worry. God gave you this child for a reason. Things will go wrong, will never be perfect and you will make some hum-dinger mistakes. It helped me so much when I made peace with that, vowed to God to do my best, and asked HIM to take over from there. Enjoy the Journey!

    • Tshanina Peterson
      Tshanina Peterson07-18-2014

      Dawnita, I totally agree that we spend a lot of time worrying about things that never happen. I’m glad to know that I’m not alone in being scared at the thought of motherhood!

      Thanks for the encouragement!

  2. C
    C07-18-2014

    Oh my, YES! Being a first-time mom comes with that fear of the unknown. I found out that God gives a mother special instinct to determine why her baby is crying. There are different cries for different reasons and you will definitely be able to figure that out.

    A baby does change the dynamics of a couple. It broadens your relationship to include your child – a part of you both. A baby enlarges your hearts and gives you more love than you ever dreamed possible. A baby pulls back the curtain of your hearts to reveal even more special things about yourself and your spouse. A baby drives you nearer to the heart of your Heavenly Father as you seek wisdom to love them and train them up in His nurture and admonition. A baby shows you things about yourself that you will want to make better and wonderful things about yourself that you never knew.

    I’ve seen you with your niece and nephews and highly doubt that your child will be a little person that no one wants to be around. You have too much good home training for that to ever happen.

    I love the way that you aren’t afraid to talk about your feelings and your fears. You’ve got the makings to be a great mother and don’t you ever forget it!

    • Tshanina Peterson
      Tshanina Peterson07-19-2014

      Thanks for the words of wisdom and encouragement, C!

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